Kenyan media personality Adelle Onyango opens up on why her marriage ended, she refused to take her husband’s surname
Media personality Adelle Onyango candidly shared the reasons behind her divorce, shedding light on the tensions that arose from her refusal to adhere to traditional marital expectations.
She opened up about her divorce from her ex-husband, Falgun Bhojak. The two had a private and colourful wedding in 2017.
In a recent address, she revealed that her decision not to have children, take her husband’s surname, and wear a wedding ring were some of the factors that led to the dissolution of her marriage.
In the heartfelt monologue, Adelle said, “I married a man from a completely different culture, and I remember on our third date laying down my deal breakers. Listen, all
Christmases are going to be spent with my family, and if you don’t like it, leave now.”
This early assertion of her boundaries set the stage for the challenges that would later emerge in her marriage.
Known for having stern feministic stance, she admitted to the strain caused by her non-traditional views.
“I was very outspoken, I had loud feminist takes, and I was a media personality well known for speaking out,” she explained.
She also expressed her dislike for her apartment, stating, “Our apartment, I hated it. I would drive home from work and turn onto the pothole-riddled road, and I just regret living there. I’d park my car, climb up the staircase to our unit, and it had these dark, dirty gray walls, and I’d just get enraged. It never felt like home.”
These, she says, spilled over to her marriage after barely two Christmases. “It was not just the apartment that didn’t feel like home, but also my marriage,” she said
On the other hand, she revealed that her ex-husband expected a more traditional wife, which contrasted with her identity.
“It was becoming very clear that the wife my husband wanted was nothing like me,” she stated.
A turning point in their relationship came during a late-night conversation after numerous arguments.
Onyango recalled her husband’s words: “You refuse to give me three things that make a marriage. You don’t want to give me a child, you wouldn’t take my surname, and you stopped wearing your ring.”
This moment of clarity led her to acknowledge, “I remember feeling like, well, he’s right. I’m definitely not that traditional woman.”
The emotional toll of these differences was palpable as Onyango confessed, “I was so exhausted, and all I could whisper was, ‘I can’t do this anymore, I can’t do us anymore.'”
